An Absolute Bloody Disaster

An Absolute Bloody Disaster is the debut novel by author Lindsay Clement. It follows Charlotte Novik, a vampire girl, as she navigates a minefield of centuries-old grudges, revenge plots, and the hazards of falling for a human boy. Complete with plenty of sass, angst, and a full cast of unique characters, this book is one you can really sink your teeth into!

"...An incredible debut novel."

"colour me impressed."

"If the vampires don't win you over, the golden boy surely will."

"This book is a must read for all the vampire lovers out there!"

COMING
2025

"Charlotte is AMAZING! I feel like I really relate to her."

- Excerpts from Goodreads reviews

To play, press and hold the enter key. To stop, release the enter key.

Full Synopsis

"Immortality is kind to no one."

Charlotte Novik is a typical 19-year-old girl: she has an obnoxious older brother, friends who drive her crazy, a giant mansion overlooking the San Francisco Bay, and a refrigerator filled with blood bags.

Oh, and did she mention she’s a vampire? Because that’s kind of important.

When Charlotte accidentally kills someone on a busy street in broad daylight, she unwittingly sets off a string of similar murders throughout the city. Not only do these murders seem somehow connected to her, but also to an ancient vampire whose revenge-laden shadow has loomed over her family for centuries.

Haunted by her best friend’s death (and, subsequently, her murderer), Charlotte and her derelict family are forced to hunt down the killer before he threatens the exposure of vampire-kind.

After all, what could go wrong? Especially with the gaggle of college kids who keep infiltrating their plans, and the golden human boy who can’t seem to leave her alone.